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The Bulletin’s Day Book

March 28, 1934
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Of late we have received frequent communications from an unsigned person who writes on the back of a postcard. His notes, in fancy European script, are mailed from the Grand Central Annex sub-station, and they embrace terse criticisms of the Jews.

Appreciative as we are of the heartbreak incurred when manuscripts are returned from hardboiled editors, or even, worse, never again hearing from or seeing in print a brain child, we herewith submit his latest communication:

“Thank God, that Austria (the land where I was born) is savet from that devilish, Jewish, hydra-head. Dollfuss, is a little gread Man, just, Nopolion, was, a little gread Man. Christians, of America, wake ob, till it is to late.”

Aside from the profundity of thought in the above communication, we would like to consider the literary merit of the work. So that the writer will not think we are putting on airs (after all, we are brothers in the writing game) we reply in his own language:

“Austria, (the Land where you was born) neads you, if it, is going too, be savet. Austria (the Land where you was born) neads al, little, gread Men. Why, dont, you, go, back and, bring all little gread, Men of America with, you, to Austria (the Land where you was born). Then Austria, could, be savet from that devilish, Jewish, hydrahead. Just, Nopolion, was, a little gread Man, Pelley, a little gread Man to. Gulden, and, Christians also is, little gread Men. Wake ob all you, dopes, go back too Austria (the Land where you was born) till it is to late.

“Yor spelling is little, bit, wrong, but yor punctuation is gread. There is more, punctuation, then anybody could, hobo too having.”

At last it begins to appear that the shred of horse sense remaining in Germany is coming to the fore. From a nation of stooges two men have emerged to take leading parts in the tragedy of the Twentieth Century. We are speaking of Dr. Schacht, Reichsbank president, and Dr. Schmitt, Minister of Economics.

Last week both of these gentlemen had the unprecedented temerity to ask Hitler where he was going to get the money to finance the widespread public works projects he has lined up for the spring season. The Jews and the liberal organizations have pretty well been drained dry; intensification of the foreign boycott throws out of work thousands producing and shipping for the export trade; and the mark for sometime has been shaky.

Schacht, without mincing words, told Hitler that carrying out the re-employment scheme meant inflation–a condition with which Germany became familiar during four hungry years at the beginning of the last decade.

But Schacht will go. This has been foreordained for many months. Last summer Berliners were betting on the length of time he would remain in office. He makes the great mistake of subtracting two from two to gain an answer of, in round numbers, 0. According to Nazi calculations, two from two leaves two or better.

What Schmitt’s fate will be one can not at this moment predict. It is true that few men in Germany could so masterfully make the best of a rotten economic situation, and for this reason his fairness and restricted efforts to alleviate anti-Jewish suffering may be tolerated for some time–providing he doesn’t resign.

The situation is somewhat similar to that encountered by former Chancellor Bruening, one of the most able diplomats and finest gentlemen in the world of politics.

When Hitler came into power he realized that Bruening’s help would be necessary in almost all operations of the chancelry. Hitler submitted to Bruening for editing his first address before the Reichstag before it was read to a tense world, and Bruening was the only man who had knowledge of the text before its delivery. Its delivery was an opiate to an overwrought world.

Yet when Bruening was asked to join the government he refused. He felt that his softly spoken, finely chosen words would be drowned out in the din caused by Hitler’s saber rattling and mouthy commands to the German people. When the time comes perhaps such men as Bruening and others (if enough can be found in Germany when Hitler finishes with that poor country) will lead the nation back to light.

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